Lawyer/Drummer Charles Bonfante had a dream. A dream to put together Long Island’s first and only Pink cover band and, um, I guess play street festivals and cheesy bars and your weird cousin’s wedding or whatever it is that Pink cover bands do. But that dream was dashed when his collaborator had the gall to recruit a lady to sing with the band, and Bonfante did not think she was hot enough to be in said band.
So, naturally, he is suing both the lady, Collette McLafferty and his former collaborators for 10 million American dollars.
Via New York Post:
Bonfante — a lawyer who brags at length in his suit about drumming on tour for Michael Bolton and in the second-tier ’80s glam-metal band Saraya — says in his Suffolk County suit that McLafferty and the other band members are “subpar” musicians whom he never wanted in the act.
“McLafferty was a mediocre vocalist at best . . . She had pitch problems, oftentimes singing flat for extended periods of time,” the suit says.
And as for her look, he claimed: “She didn’t look the part, or at least contribute to the overall aesthetics of the band.”
He told his collaborator, Rik Nevone, he did not want her in the act.
But when Nevone went ahead with her at a small gig on Long Island under the name Funhouse — after Pink’s fifth album — Bonfante filed the suit against the members of the act for allegedly ruining his Pink band scheme.
McLafferty — who lives on the Lower East Side and fronts a band called edibleRed — says she never heard of Bonfante before the suit.
Making matters worse, McLafferty was paid only $75 for the gig that now has her facing humiliation and huge legal bills.
“I get to fight this for the next two years, according to my lawyer,” she said. “I’m going to be broke, and he’s going to have a hobby.”
Bonfante also says that at 40 years-old, she is too old to be in his awesome Pink cover band. Yet, he himself is old enough to have been in an 80′s hair metal band? That’s weird. Still, not something to launch a lawsuit over. I mean, he can probably just quit the band and form another Pink cover band with a bunch of super-hot 20 year-olds who want desperately to be in a Pink cover band with a 50 year-old personal injury lawyer, right? Sure there are lots of those out there. See
The band is called “Funhouse” after a Pink album. I looked them up, and weirdly, it seems that they don’t just cover Pink songs, but songs by other people in what they imagine is the style of Pink. Per essemple, here is their cover of 4 Non Blonde’s “What’s Going On.” McLafferty is the one in the long dress, I think.
Huh. Anyway, Bonfante’s day job is being a personal injury lawyer. He is not so attractive himself. I mean, he’s certainly not attractive enough to go around telling people they are too unattractive to be in Pink cover bands. I don’t know who’s qualified for that, really, but it’s certainly not him.
Now, I did also find this video of McLafferty singing in some sort of American Idol-type thing for people who want to be on Broadway. She’s not very good. I mean, she’s maybe like “the best singer in a karaoke bar” good, but that’s about it. Still, you probably should not sue someone for $10 million just because you don’t want them in your Pink cover band.
McLafferty is counter-suing in hopes he’ll drop his claim against her, and then hopefully she and that other guy can just form a band without Bonfante if they like.
For the record, I also found a music video for Bonfante’s hair metal band from the 80′s, which I am totally going to post here, because hair and sexified pool playing.